“I’ll never love again…”

Diana was nine when she determined never to love again…

Her mom died when she was five and her dad said goodbye to his six children at the cemetery. He abandoned them with no explanation. The siblings were separated, divided among friends and relatives. No one wanted Diana.

She finally found happiness with an elderly aunt and uncle until tragedy once again ripped it away. First her uncle died and then, only a year later, her aunt lay on her death bed.   Diana knelt by her side begging her not to die. “I’ll do anything,” she cried. “I’ll stay home from school and care for you. Please don’t leave me!”

The next morning her aunt’s empty bed crushed her hope and confirmed her fears. Diana made a decision that day, “Everyone I love dies or leaves,” she thought. “I’m not going to love anyone again…then they won’t die”.

The walls she erected around her tiny heart were invisible and impenetrable. She grew into a woman whose outward appearance was flawless, and yet the girl inside was plagued with fear and a vain search for security… until she met Jesus.

The day Diana met Jesus her abandoned heart found a home that would never fail and a transformation began. I know—I was there.

My mom (Diana) changed before my eyes. It didn’t happen all at once, but what I saw set the course for my own destiny. Joy, laughter and love blossomed in her countenance. The only circumstance that changed in her life was Jesus. It’s the only circumstance that matters.

Life changing decisions are made when we’re children. My mom was nine when she decided not to love again—a decision that guided the next 23 years. I was eight when, alone in my bed, I asked Jesus to be my Savior and Friend. That decision led me to pray for my parents broken marriage. As I watched Jesus transform their lives and renew their marriage, a passion to tell the world about His saving power was born in my young heart.

Give your children the gift of Jesus’ unfailing love. He’s the only One who can give them hope when they feel abandoned and courage to love again.

I love you Mom!

Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close. Psalm 27:10

4 thoughts on ““I’ll never love again…”

  1. Mom

    i am moved to tears as I see in black and white on paper the transforming work of Jesus in one life and how very far reaching it is. Yes my early life was difficult and lonely, but as I look back at all of it I can join Joseph is saying “This wasn’t good but God you meant it for good”. All of these experiences have made me who I am today because of Jesus transforming power and I wouldn’t change any of it. Thank you Jesus!

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